Is My Busy Life Keeping My Husband from finding me?
Welcome to Dear Emmanuela….
Where wisdom meets grace for your journey to lasting love.
Dear Emmanuela,
My life is full — work, school, raising my children, and just trying to keep everything together. I’ve been praying for God to bless me with the husband he has for me, but deep down I wonder… is all this busyness a “cover”? Am I using it, even unknowingly, as an excuse not to put myself in position to meet someone? Is there a certain posture I should be in to receive my husband?
— Honestly Wondering
Dear Honestly Wondering,
First, thank you for being vulnerable enough to ask what so many women silently wrestle with.
Let me speak to you not just as a coach, but as a sister in Christ: Being busy is not wrong. In fact, it often means you’re being faithful to the season God has placed you in. But here's the truth: busyness can become a barrier when it becomes a way to avoid vulnerability, hope, or even the courage to believe again for love.
So, is staying busy a “cover”?
It can be.
Sometimes we stay booked and busy to feel productive, but underneath, we’re avoiding the discomfort of waiting — or worse, disappointment. It’s easier to say “I just don’t have time to date” than to admit, “I’m afraid to open my heart again.” And that’s a real place. But God wants to meet you there.
Remember this: God can’t bless what you won’t make room for.
Is there a certain posture to receive your husband?
Absolutely — and it’s less about schedule and more about spirit.
Here’s what that posture looks like:
1. Spiritual Openness
Have you brought your desire for a husband before the Lord lately — not just years ago, but recently? Or have you filed it away under “maybe someday”?
“Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her.” – Luke 1:45
Faith invites expectation. It says, “I don’t just want a husband — I believe God still has one for me.”
2. Emotional Availability
This one is subtle. You might be open in theory but guarded in practice. Emotional availability means you’re willing to let someone see you — not your resume, not your titles, not your to-do list — but you. It means you're not automatically dismissing potential suitors, shutting down conversations, or refusing to engage because “you’re too busy.”
Godly men pursue — but they need access.
3. Practical Positioning
This doesn’t mean forcing anything. It simply means intention. Are you in the kinds of environments where godly men are present? Are you allowing your trusted community to introduce you or connect you? Are you approachable, joyful, feminine — even while handling business?
You don’t have to chase a husband. But you do need to make room — in your life, your heart, and your mindset. Sometimes the posture of receiving looks like slowing down just enough for God to interrupt your schedule.
Ask the Lord this:
“Am I hiding behind my responsibilities, or am I making space for what I’ve been believing You for?”
He’ll answer — and He’ll guide you.
Trust this: You are not behind. You are not forgotten. You are being prepared — even now — for a man who sees your strength, your heart, your faith, and your beauty. Keep living with intention, and stay expectant.
With faith in God for your love story,
Emmanuela Rodenberg
Author of How to Attract a Godly Husband
Minister of the Gospel
Certified Christian Marriage Coach
Christian Dating & Relationship Coach
Founder & CEO, Wives in Training International
P.S. Hit reply and tell me — what’s one thing you're praying for in your future marriage? I’d love to pray with you! 🙏
And while you're praying and preparing for the love God has for you, don’t forget to care for yourself too.
If you’ve been wanting an easy, natural way to cover grays and feel refreshed, I highly recommend the Instant Dye Shampoo from Polar Haircare. It covers grays in just 10 minutes, has no ammonia, and leaves your hair looking radiant—like the queen you are. 👑
💌 Got a Question for Emmanuela?
Have a question about love, dating, or marriage that’s been on your heart?
You’re not alone—and you don’t have to walk through it alone either. That’s what Dear Emmanuela is here for: to offer wisdom, truth, and grace for your real-life relationship questions.
Ask anonymously or leave your name—it’s completely up to you. Your question may be featured (anonymously) in a future blog post to help other women who may be going through the same thing.
Fill out the form below or email me directly at E@DearEmmanuela.com